Why is Sex So Important in a Relationship?

Let’s just face the music; each and every one of us has met that person in our lives that was absolutely perfect in all aspects…except for the bedroom. Try as you might have to disregard your own needs and simply believe that the less than stellar compatibility, (or nonexistence), or your sex life with that person wasn’t the problem, it is extremely difficult to continue a successful relationship with that weight lugging you down. Seeking out couples’ sex therapy to deal with said conflicts within the couple is an excellent step, but there is often a bit of resistance from those that are unsure of the real importance of sex as a solitary component. After all, knowing that it can be a thorn in the side of an otherwise completely successful and loving partnership, what does sex actually bring to the table? Well, dear reader, let us inform you.

1. Let’s bond, baby: Intimacy is key in any relationship, and sex is a tremendous act and example of that. The bond that occurs not only when all parties involved are physically connected but emotionally in the same headspace is something that is uniquely presented in sex alone. It gives you the time to be in the moment with your partner(s) and truly be giving them your full attention and appreciation. To say that this isn’t necessary for a relationship also devalues the intimacy that comes in moments that may not be considered sexual but are involved oftentimes also in the act; kissing, cuddling, touching non-erogenous zones, etc. These actions should not only be included in the concept of sexual intimacy, but these are oftentimes left out and help bring a loving and not merely lustful aspect to building that bond with your partner(s). In short, building a bond with all those involved is one of the most important building blocks in creating a stable relationship.
2. Talk it out: Communication is a staple in every partnership and sex, and developing a good rapport is something that is an absolute necessity to not only keep everyone involved happy but to keep things consensual and concise. Not only is it a tool with which to provide the best level of pleasure for your partner(s), vocalizing your own desires and needs creates an opportunity for you to get back all of the efforts, (and orgasms) reciprocated! Not only that, but the openness that can be developed when there are lines of communication that are well-formed can also carry over into other aspects of the relationship and benefit those areas also.
3. It’s fun: The short and sweet of it is the absolute truth; Sex should be fun! It should not be a chore, a job (in relation to your partner or partners), instead, it should be a moment of whimsy and playfulness. Will stuff go wrong, messes are made, accidents happen? Absolutely. The important part of that is how those moments are dealt with by everyone involved. Laughter should be welcome and even appreciated. It is important to not take ourselves, our partner(s), or our actions too seriously.

All in all, sex is great; not only in terms of pure goodness but in levels of importance as well! As such, it needs to be treated with equal care as all other aspects of your relationship(s), and oftentimes that means it deserves an equal amount of couple’s sex therapy and care. So, next time your flame goes out, feel free to give Respark a call for couples’ sex therapy!

Written by: Alena Newland