Sex Therapy While Single – The Benefits of Individual Sex Therapy

While both couples therapy and marriage therapy may be seemingly synonymous with sex therapy, there is honestly no better way to get to know yourself quite…intimately. Whether you are searching for a hookup, a life partner, or content to be a single pringle for a while, the ability to learn more about yourself in this way is always worth the work. Regardless of if your end goal is to be in a sexual relationship of any capacity with a partner (or partners), sex therapy while single provides you with the tools to put the work into yourself, no matter what use to which that will be put later. While it may be difficult to see the need for independent and individual sex therapy when the world is oftentimes focused on it being a type of therapy merely practiced once a person is in a relationship, let’s break this down into two subcategories; development for future partnerships and self-love for self’s sake.
We all know the dating world is tough, but going through it without understanding your sexual needs, desires and capabilities are going to prove very difficult in terms of developing true and deep sexual communication. How can you explain to your future partner(s) what would make you feel the best in all ways, (the physical, emotional, and mental sense) if you haven’t figured these out for yourself? That isn’t to say that these tastes can’t change over time; we as humans are constantly developing and changing not only on our own but with the influences of other people within our lives. This is also not to say that you need to have everything figured out before you approach another person with the intent to build a bond with them of any capacity. However, learning not only what you are looking for but also how to communicate that to another person is invaluable to provide a stable and open foundation on which to build a relationship. This is also helpful in creating an open line of communication for another person to divulge their wants, needs, and ideas in return. In short, by putting this work via individual sex therapy into yourself to work through sexual triggers, develop kinks and create enjoyable practices and habits, serves to make you a more rounded partner with which to build a said relationship. While this is not the only use for individualized sex therapy, the benefits of it are both obvious and plentiful.
On the flip side of the coin, approaching individual sex therapy without the intent to enter into a relationship either at all or anytime soon can be highly beneficial also. While you won’t be using these newly developed skills and understanding to contribute to a relationship with others, the need for true self-love and understanding without the need for it to be of use to outside relationships is of equal importance. Fairly often in our attempts to be gracious and caring lovers to others, we let our desires fall by the wayside, (if we even feel worthy of mentioning or acting on them at all) and this can manifest itself in multiple difficulties not only in achieving climax even by self-stimulation but also in allowing sexual shame to permeate your experiences both past and future. Individual sex therapy is particularly useful in this way, as it works to not only reassure our desires being legitimate and worthwhile, but it allows for an environment with which to truly take the time to provide the research and experimentation with only ourselves to answer to. This is also an especially important tool when working through sexual trauma or assault, as the survivor may not feel ready to branch out into sexual intimacy with others. This type of growth and rediscovery is something that can oftentimes be rushed unnecessarily by other people involved in the survivor’s life and therefore the need for personal one-on-one therapy in this nature is crucial. The journey back to oneself once an assault has happened is a difficult one, and we are here for every step of it.
All in all, many people approach sex therapy with the idea that it can only be done with all current partner(s) present and involved, and we are even now continuing to break down that stereotype as we see it appear. The one thing we hope that is taken away from this is that the one thing required for you to start sex therapy is simply that; you.

Written by: Alena Newland